How To Detach Past Negative Experiences

Our lives are the result of countless thoughts, experiences and memories. How we react to each and every circumstance we encounter in life is dependent on many factors. In this article I want to share the importance of associations and attachments to things we experience, and how they greatly affect our life's direction.

Mental Reference Points

The mind works off many points in time – past, present and future. It uses the past as a reference point based upon things that have happened previously and how we feel about them. This is ultimately based on the way we question experiences and the attachment we place upon them. In the present when we are faced with a certain situation, we flick back through other similar experiences using these reference points, which in turn help create the outcome we choose in the present. Therefore it is important to be aware that the attachment we give to things will ultimately play a large role in the outcomes we create in the future.

Emotions play a huge role in this. It is important to take control of your thoughts and feelings to ensure you attach the correct 'label' so to speak for how you feel about every single thing that happens in your life. This is so you can properly file away your experiences so they can be used in a positive context later on.

Degrees of Attachments

Attachments comes in varying degrees, ranging from “nothing” to the “extreme”. When we have 'extreme' or 'nothing' attachments, these will both will control our lives and stop us living our true self. When you view a situation and experience it in a neutral manner, you are in the 'meditation mode' of the mind so to speak. This is the 'reflective side', which is the proper way to use what is called the 'negative side'. This is to the best way to find faults, free from judgement and completely detached, in order to find the solution. Doing this you can act upon the situation, giving yourself a new direction and or a plan of attack for the outcome required with a new purpose.

An interesting sidenote - up until about the age of 40 we are more attached to the makings of others. This includes their opinions, who we should be, what we shouldn't do etc. This happens until we become wise and detach held beliefs which are not necessarily our own. The quicker we learn this the quicker we live a more true representation of our own life .

The Heart (Feelings)

The mind is controlled by the heart and the attachments/feelings it has from experiences. The vibrations from your heart magnetize you towards situations, people and outcomes you are attached to based on past experiences. This is all based upon how you feel, as the heart absorbs feelings and puts them into an emotional context through its connection with your mind.

When we attach ourselves to a point of view or experience we are creating an outcome – be it negative or positive. We give purpose and direction to that outcome on a subconscious level.

The Role Of Anger

The emotion of anger is directed internally, often by saying “this will never happen to me again”. This will grab the attention of the subconscious and force it into protection and self-preservation mode. At this stage your subconscious response will be to look out for you as it tries to stop the re-occurring events. However if your subconscious response is over-protective it will create fear, thus finding the right balance is the key here. It is important to be aware of this change and the thoughts which pop in your mind. Here you should question the purpose of each thought, and if it sounds over the top (which you will know by your behaviors and the way you feel) it may even stop you living life and going into seclusion.

Not Repeating the Same Themes

It is the magnetic effect of the flow of energy at any point in time that your reality is created. When you have the same reoccurring circumstances in life like “why does this always happens to me” that the flow of energy is not right. This is when you require change.

When faced with this cycle, the past must be dealt with. Doors need to be closed as you move forward by creating new attachments, lessons learnt, new points of view, being grateful of the experiences, adopting a “been there done that” attitude, and creating a new purpose and direction in your life. In this way you can use even negative past experiences much like a university degree that fuels the knowledge of what to do better next time.

To do this you must take responsibility , face the truth and stop excuses and guessing games. The “WHY ME” attitude is simply a bandage for the the truth, acting like a cloud covering the sun.

Relationships

Take a look at the relationship you have with yourself and whoever/whatever else is in your life. Any relationship you have, living or material, set a benchmark for this in your mind. The mind, body and spirit then create a behavior, a cause and affect with the relationship, and like every relationship, the more you appreciate and look after whatever it is , the more you receive by giving. When the relationship is not appreciated or used for the wrong purpose, it falls apart. The neutral side is to review this, fix it, and move forward. This can be especially done through hypnosis to create a new direction , purpose and action and also with mediation to review and reflect.

Detaching Past Experiences

If you don’t detach your negative past experiences which affect your life, they will continue to haunt you and reoccur through an auto-pilot type effect. Detachment comes from a seed which evolves within until you have had enough and explode. This happens when you are forced to change because everything seems out of our control, or feeling empty, or until something greater enters your life. When creating change at this point, the seed must be dealt with or it will reappear and make no mistake, it will affect you on every level mind body and spirit. Signs will include low energy, over-eating /addictive behaviours, or the physical body is affected because you are not looking after yourself.

Life is a like a heart beat. When you are living YOUR life it is alive, when you stop living YOUR life it becomes flat lined so to speak. Life will always have its ups and downs... these are simply opportunities for you to shine, detach problems, and attach yourself to solutions. Therefore it is important to choose your attachments wisely.

Summary

So much can be said by how we internally process our thoughts/experiences as to the outcomes which we create. Once you have built the proper internal mechanisms to learn from past mistakes, place the right attachment to them, and only allow them to positively affect your present, you will always keep moving forward. This is a continually evolving process, in which what you do in the present ultimately creates your destiny. When we leave our journey of life, we are remembered by our story and how we made a difference in people s lives. This story is created one page at a time and it all begins with what you do with each thought or experience you have. Make your story a great one of love, kindness and joy.

- Giovanni Lordi